the demon

today was a day for nothingness. The calm after the storm of weeks of visiting and touring, eating and drinking, laughing and crying.

I brushed my teeth after lunch and worked from the depths of my bed in leggings and the blue and grey plaid shirt you loved so much. I took a swim and spent a lot of time at the bottom of the pool, wallowing in the crystal blue silence of emptiness. Is it normal to love solitude as much as I do? I often wonder. The fuchsia flowers are falling from the Prince of India tree and they are hazy circles of pastel promise from down here.

The wind blew so hard it shook the demon from my body and i think he has left now. I see his shadow sometimes in the eyes of others but I am strong. Stronger than ever. I will honour my promise to you… to not look deep enough for him to take me back again.

in your light love, i learn how to love.
in your beauty, how to make poems.
you dance inside my chest where no-one sees you,
but sometimes i do,
and that sight becomes this art.
Rumi

Image: Death to Stock.